SYDNEY (Reuters) – Predicting future house prices is always a gamble, but for a bearish Australian academic who lost a bet that prices would crash, it also involves a trek to the country’s highest mountain peak.
Blog Guy, the other day you explained that it’s perfectly okay to root for the bull at a bullfight. So what else can we do to help even the odds?
I’m glad you asked. Check out this matador who was gored by a bull during a fight. He’s surrounded by his so-called “assistants.”
Do you think the poor bull has any “assistants?” I mean, even though these four guys don’t look too bright, they’re better than nothing.
What do you propose, Blog Guy?
An equal number of animals assisting the bull.
Like maybe – and this is just off the top of my head – the bull gets to come into the ring flanked by a Tyrannosaurus Rex, a chimp trained to use a flame-thrower, a hungry 50-foot python and, um, a Great White Shark who has some kind of on-land breathing equipment and a motorized skateboard. Who wouldn’t pay to see THAT?
But meanwhile, you know what I love about this photo? The look on that butthead assistant in green.
He’s like, “The bool is alive, and he is peesed! Amigos, I theenk I left zee headlights on in my car! I weel be right back!”
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Mexican matador Arturo Macias lies on the arena surrounded by his assistants after being gored by a bull during a bullfight in The Maestranza bull ring in Seville April 13, 2010. REUTERS/Marcelo del Pozo
A host talks in front of a Tyrannosaurus rex replica display during a media preview of the “Playing with Dinosaurs” exhibition in Taipei, December 7, 2009. REUTERS/Nicky Loh
Blog Guy, I’m a regular reader of your blog, and I need a personal favor.
Sorry, I can’t really get involved with helping people, I’ve got a lot of readers.
Please! My daughter is going to Washington DC, and I know you live there. She doesn’t know a soul, and I’m hoping you can help her meet some nice young men.
Gosh, I’m not comfortable with….
I’ll be honest, she’s a bit eccentric. She wears a huge feathered bird in her hair. Her eyes look like some kind of space alien, and she uses strange make-up.
She wears her hair in multi-colored braids, and she tends to like homemade outfits made from knotted hemp….
She’s made some mistakes. She did hard time for manslaughter and arson, and held up a convenience store…
Yikes. Look, I’d really like to help, especially for the daughter of a regular reader, but I don’t…
Here, Blog Guy, here’s a picture of her, so you can spot her at the airport.
Well, why didn’t you SAY so! If I can’t help a faithful reader, then for heaven’s sake, who CAN I help!
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A model shows a hairstyle during the Crystal Angel Festival in Kiev April 14, 2010. The annual international competition of hairdressers, fashion and design started in the Ukrainian capital today. REUTERS/Gleb Garanich
CANBERRA (Reuters) – Businessmen who vowed to hit the gym daily in 2010 but are yet to leave the desk are the target of a new, fast-growing line of high-tech underwear which boasts to trim the torso while also benefiting your health.
COPENHAGEN (Reuters) – A Danish hotel is pioneering a pedal-power electricity generation scheme it hopes will catch on in other countries.
MIAMI (Reuters) – A U.S. judge has agreed to referee a dispute among Florida political activists over who can use the phrase “Tea Party” in their name.
Blog Guy, don’t you have a vacation coming up? I guess as a top travel writer you must know all the best destinations.
Yeah, I had been thinking about Dublin or Edinburgh, but then I read a travel piece called Travel Postard: 48 hours in Luanda, Angola, and it totally sold me on going there.
Where will you stay? Are you going soon?
No, the article says getting a visa can take months, and hotel rooms are scarce and very expensive.
That’s what credit cards are for, right?
No, it says I should take lots of cash, since credit cards are rarely accepted.
Apart from getting a visa are there any other special preparations?
It says to get a yellow fever shot, and to arrange for a driver since there are very few taxis.
Are there any great places to eat there?
You bet. The article recommends Cais de Cuatro. Says it’s one of the most expensive restaurants in town. Great fish, but slow service. Then I’m going to Palos, to sample Luanda’s nightlife.
Nightlife! Your chance to raise the roof!
Well no, it says there isn’t a roof at Palos.
Jeez, Blog Guy, I’m kind of tired of Luanda already. Can we leave now?
Sure thing. The article says to allow four hours to get to the airport, on account of the mammoth traffic jams.
Well I’m not going to Luanda if it’s over-run with tourists.
Not to worry. The article also says, ”hardly any tourists come here.” I can’t imagine why not.
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An Angolan fisherman sits by his boat against the backdrop of the capital Luanda, January 20, 2010.
Faded colonial architecture sits next to the headquarters of the Angolan state oil company Sonagol, in Luanda January 20, 2010.
REUTERS photos by Mike Hutchings
Blog Guy, I worry that President Obama is under too much pressure, what with the economy, health care reform and all that stuff. Any sign that he may not be able to handle the stress?
Well, you’re not the only one who is concerned about that.
At this week’s Nuclear Security Summit here in Washington, the president seemed to be imagining guests who weren’t there.
He was seen introducing real world leaders to characters such as Mister Clean, Atticus Finch, Michaele Salahi, Chingachgook and “Newman, that mailman from Seinfeld.”
The Chingachgook from “The Last of the Mohicans”, Blog Guy?
That’s probably the one, yes.
Wow, that’s a little embarrassing. It must have been a disaster for all involved.
Not really. Japan’s prime minister invited Newman over for a state visit.
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U.S. President Barack Obama greets Japan’s Prime Minister Yukio Hatoyama (R) at the Nuclear Security Summit in Washington April 12, 2010. REUTERS/Jason Reed
U.S. President Barack Obama (L) welcomes India’s Prime Minister Manmohan Singh to the summit. REUTERS/Jim Young
Wayne Knight, Newman on the TV show “Seinfeld,” in a 1998 file photo. REUTERS/Ray Stubblebine
Michaele Salahi pauses while testifying before the House Homeland Security Committee on Capitol Hill in Washington, January 20, 2010. REUTERS/Larry Downing
Blog Guy, may I get a little serious here?
I really wish you wouldn’t.
Thanks. Last week when you wrote about El Señor Magoo, the matador with bad eyesight, some of the commenters mentioned going to bullfights and rooting for the bull. Is that allowed?
Yes, I’m sure it must be. What possible logic could there be in only allowing folks to root for the matador?
I mean, imagine saying, “I’d like to go to the Raptors/Pistons game tonight, but they’re only letting Raptors fans in.”
Yeah, when you put it that way…
In fact, let’s extend that sports analogy a bit, even though bullfighting isn’t really a sport.
If only one team was playing VOLUNTARILY, and the other was being FORCED to play, then I imagine everybody would root for the unwilling underdog.
The more I think about it, the more I’m sure they must have to PAY a few poor slobs to root for the matador at these things!
I bet you’re right, Blog Guy. How much cash would it take to get YOU to root for the bullfighter?
There’s not enough money on earth.
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Spanish matador Oliva Soto is tackled by a bull during a bullfight in The Maestranza bullring in Seville April 12, 2010. REUTERS/Marcelo del Pozo
CUT! Okay, let me see the director RIGHT NOW!
Lamar! I gave you $160 million to make an enchanting live action children’s movie based on that enduring song, “The Animal Fair.” Then I come down here two months into the shoot, and I find this crap?
Relax Boss. It’s all in the song.
Look here at the lyrics, the last line: “The elephant sneezed and fell on his knees, and what became of the monk?” See?
Lamar, the song is talking about a MONKEY, not a Buddhist monk!
A real monkey?
Yes.
Jeez Boss, I wish we’d known that when there was still time to save that poor stunt guy in the orange outfit.
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Top: An elephant plays with a Buddhist monk as it tries to climb steps at a temple that is preparing for the New Year, in Colombo April 11, 2010. REUTERS/Dinuka Liyanawatte
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